Wednesday, August 4, 2010

There's no place like home

So I'm in Bay City. For 2 weeks. Do I want to be? Absolutely not. I would much rather be in my new apartment getting it all nice and cozy.

Plus sides:
1) Like, 4 blocks away from the library
2) Closer to Tim

1) Away from my friends
2) No internet (hence the library)
3) Have not yet seen Tim
4) My sister's a nut
5) I'm treated like I'm still 10. I'm 19, guys.

But hopefully I can make my way back to Mt. Pleasant sooner than expected. I miss sleeping in a bed.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Plans Schmans

So it looks like I'll be staying with my sister in Bay City for a couple weeks. Which means I can't start working til I get back. Which means I get to miss out on two weeks where I could have been making money.

I love when life gives you lemons. Also, my roommate packed up all her things and booked. Didn't help clean or anything. She also left her ferrets. Her FERRETS! First of all, you can't have pets at CB. Second of all, she's going to be charged $3500. Yup. I hope she realizes this. We have to be out by noon tomorrow and she's left on a road trip. How wonderful.

Oh well, I'm not going to worry about it. It's on her. Now I sit waiting for my sister to pick me up and haul myself along with my belongings about an hour away. I'll be staying in Bay City where I know a few people and I'll be able to see Tim more often, which is a plus.

I'm looking forward to moving into my new place, but not looking forward to lugging all my things and probably more back to Mount Pleasant. I can't wait to start my job, cosmetology school and have my friends move back here for the new school year. In the meantime, I'll suck it up for two weeks and play my ukulele.

Thursday, July 29, 2010


Everyone needs to stop what they're doing right now and watch Everything Is Illuminated. I Netflixed it and loved it. I've been waiting years to watch it and finally found it. It's beautiful, and I'm automatically biased towards anything with Elijah Wood in it.

Today I'm taking the plunge. I'll be officially registered as a cosmetology student as of 1:30 this afternoon. I'm so excited to get back into the swing of things.

I'm also helping my dear friend Nick move from his apartment into a house he will be sharing with 9 (yes, you read correctly) other people. I still have yet to find a place in town for those 2 weeks between my leases. I called to see if I could move in early, and I'm just waiting on the call. Ugh. Oh, and packing sucks. SUCKS.

But even with all my complaining, I'm super jazzed to be getting out of my current place and into a smaller, cozier, cheaper place. It's super cute and has TONS of closet space.

I feel like things are finally starting to look up for me.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I have a job interview today. At big. But it IS my favorite fast-food place. If you can consider Subway fast-food.

Annnyway. I have to be out of my apartment Monday. Monday! This summer is flying by and i still have no idea where I'll be for two weeks. Not cool guys, not cool.

I really hope it doesn't rain today because I have to either walk or bike to my interview. That wouldn't look so great if I walked in completely drenched. But then again, they would see how absolutely desperate I am for a job..I can't even buy a car! They would feel pity and just hand me the job before conducting the interview. Okay, okay, I'm making up scenarios now.


PS. Let's hope my massive check arrives today...along with my Netflix pick.

Peace, love, and ukulele.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

I had a few minutes before I had to run out the door and figured I'd post a small one.
I've been costuming and finding so many awesome things in the costume room that I want to give a new home. But alas, I'm no thief.

I still don't have all the measurements and spent the entire morning emailing and calling cast members. Who knew they were soooo busy to come in a half hour early for rehearsals?! Ugh. But I keep on truckin'. Apparently with a new southern accent.

That happens from time to time. I'll be speaking to someone, or in my head..and a random accent will appear. Is that weird? Probably. Do I care? Not really.

I've been thinkin' and thinkin' about topics I could blog about and nothing really sparks my interest. So until then, I'll just ramble on about my extremely boring life and my weird obsessions/problems/whatever.

I'll snap some pictures today with my phone of the messes I have to rummage through. It's crazy, guys. You'll see. I want to know who's responsible for cleaning because they're not doing their job. There are countless wedding dresses on the floor because they simply don't have the room for everything. Maybe I should give some items a new home...just to make room for everything ;)

Just kidding! But, it looks like this is all I have time for until later.

Peace, Love and Ukulele.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. Each prayer accepted and each wish resigned.

A horrible yesterday led to a horrible last night. Which led to me feeling sorry for myself..for really unnecessary reasons.

First of all, the rest of the chorus didn't show up to get measured. I got about 4 out of the remaining 12...these chitlins hate me. I rode my bike back, (which didn't take as long as usual because I found a shortcut) went upstairs where I then stripped down to my skivvies and tried to relax. I then took the coldest shower imaginable and got ready for my kind of-sort of date. I get all ready and looking cute when the date calls me. His brother came by unexpected-like to help him finish moving into his new place.

sdghehqei...there went my awesome evening with an awesome fella. This gave me too much time to sit around thinking. Thinking about how sucky it is that I can't afford CMU anymore and I won't be starting class until almost a month after all my friends. I was feeling lonely and pathetic and freaking out because I don't know where I'll be living for those 2 weeks in between leases.

Also, my lack of a job is getting old pretty quick. Sometimes I feel like giving up because it's like my countless job applications are a waste of time. It's not good for me to have nothing to do for long periods of time...I think too much.

I called the best friend; she was on a date. Made me feel even better. Called my mom because frankly, she always makes me feel better and we can talk for hours about mindless things. She was asleep. I facebooked a bit, but that gets old in five minutes. So I signed off and listened to Ryan Star. I tell ya...he is the cheese to my emotional macaroni..whatever that means. Anytime I feel blue, I listen to his music, and it just makes me feel...good for a lack of a better word.

And it isn't purely his music. About a year ago, he performed at the college and I got to meet him afterward. I was a huge HUGE fan of his from Rockstar:Supernova and followed him after that. I seriously talked to him and his band for a good 45 minutes after the show; It was amazing! Well, after that show, I was dumped, told I wasn't the "marrying type" and ripped of any dignity I had. I fell into a deep depression with many things going on in my life that I couldn't handle. I listened to nothing but RStar and I was able to let go. I was able to Breathe. After a few months, I sent his producer an email in hopes he would forward it to Ryan. He did and I received the most kind words from Ryan and it changed my life. It made me realize that nothing is too hard to get through. I sing his music at the top of my lungs and it changes everything. I feel so content.

I stopped worrying about CMU because ultimately, it wasn't what I really wanted. I realized that I was miserable and was only pursuing a degree for my father. I'm super jazzed to be going back to cosmetology and getting my life in order. And when I worry about not having a job at the moment, I sit and think about all those who are worse off than I am. People with families and are now living on the streets. Even though things get tough, I am truly blessed. And I appreciate everything and everyone in my life.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

2 days in a row?!

Yeah..I told you I'd be a better blogger.

To Do list for today:
-Ride bike downtown while looking super cute.
-Finish taking measurements of snot-faced chorus people
-Rummage with my costume-mate through racks and racks of costumes
-Sweat my nonexistent balls off (was that too vulgar? sorry if it was..if not, no apologies)
-Spend the evening with a nice fellow.

As promised, here's the latest on T. He calls me yesterday morning, waking me up. Which is totally fine because 1) I love waking up to his voice and 2) He keeps me from sleeping in too late (which I HATE doing because then I feel like I've wasted half the day). We're talking for a little over an hour and I don't know how the subject came up, but I hear the words "You're going to hate me, but I got you another gift." We've had 1 date. One.

I HATE being spoiled. It makes me uncomfortable being the center of attention and it just puts me in an awkward position. Instinctively, I freak out:
Me: "Whyyy?! You need to quit spoiling me, T!"
T: "Why not? I told you I was going to get you 12 gifts..just like the 12 days of Christmas." (cute, right? But still.)
Me: "I didn't think you were serious! You're joking. You didn't get me anything..stop being mean to me."
T: (laughing at my stupidity) "No, I really did. I'll take a picture and send it to you once we're off the phone. It's awesome. AWEEEESOME and you're going to LOOOOVE it!"
Me: "What is it?"
T: "I can't ruin the surprise."

After like, 20 minutes of me poking and prodding trying to get answers, we hang up and the picture came in. The first thing I see is the price tag. $189.99...the next thing I realize is that it's a jewelry box..with a chain..and his thumb covering up the necklace. What the bloody hell is this?! I mean, I know it's not like a MASSIVE amount of money, but when you're a broke college student with past relationships with boys who didn't buy you anything more than dinner, it's a lot. I told T it was a bit excessive and he claims to be an excessive person. I like him a lot. Like, a lot a lot. I just don't know how to handle being spoiled like this.

It probably seems suuuuper silly, but I have weird issues. I won't even get into it right now.

Saturday, July 24, 2010


I know that I've been negligent of yet another blog, but I've been super busy and need to get used to posting all the time. I'm still trying to find my niche, but in the meantime...I'm just having fun :) I'll be a better mother to my baby. I'm even trying to design a new...whatever. And..AND I must say that I was extremely giddy to see that one of my favorite bloggers commented on my last post. AWESOME...hi Booyah!

Since my last post, so many things have fallen into place which makes me an extremely happy camper. Cosmetology starts September 13th. I signed a lease for a new (cheap but cozy) apartment where I only have 1 roommate. 1 roommate! And she's awesome! The apartment isn't furnished at all, which means I get to decorate how I want...which makes me ecstatic!

But of course there has to be one sucky thing. Which is, you ask? lease at CB ends Aug. 2nd and my lease at TC starts the 16th. That leaves me 2 weeks...with nowhere to go. Well, I could go home or to my sister's for those two weeks, but this girl has responsibilities. Responsibilities that require me to be in Mt. (not so) Pleasant..I'll figure it out.

My first costuming meeting threw a couple of surprises at me. When I volunteered, I didn't realize I would be in charge of costumes AND set design. WHAT?! Apparently I didn't think I had enough on my plate. Those little snots in the chorus like to give me crap. "I don't want to be measured. This is stupid. I wear a size blah blah blah. I feel violated." Too bad.

But on the plus side, my father has finally come to terms that I'm not going to finish my fashion degree, but instead pursue my (real) dreams and get my assoc. in business. Also, my skills on the ukulele are improving much faster than I thought. Next, I'm getting a banjo. And a gee-tar. Maybe a harmonica. And become a one-woman band. Yup.

And Tim? Oh man oh man. That's a story for the next post. Hint: guilt, being spoiled, and unnecessary purchases.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Happy Birthday, Little Sister

My dad and Emily circa December 2009.
Blurry, but I think it's adorable.

Tomorrow is my little sister, Emily's 9th birthday. She's going to be in the 4th grade in the fall. Time is FLYING by. In honor of her birth, I've took the time to learn Happy Birthday on the ukulele and made her a necklace with a matching bracelet.

Making her jewelry has made me want to reestablish my earlier goal of starting an Etsy shop. I went thrift shopping the other day and passed up sooo many good finds. Because they didn't fit right. But I knew they would sell. I've been kicking myself for 2 days.

I'm pretty freakin' stoked to be visiting home this weekend. I haven't seen my parents and my sister in about a month, which is beyond horrible. I also get to see the little kittens my cat birthed. :) Excitement filled weekend!

Sunday I have my first Sweeney Todd meeting. I'm the new costumer and 2 other people graciously offered to assist. :) My life has been looking up lately. More news next week.

Edit: My obsessions are getting out of control.
  • New obscure indie music; my iPod is at it's limit and I've had to take others off that I love.
  • The blogs I follow; the amount is getting out of control. But there are just so many amazing bloggers out there that promote others. I fall in love instantly. I'm currently following 17 blogs. Do you have any idea how long it takes me to get through my blog-readings everyday?I'm not complaining, I just need to tone it down a bit. :P
  • My new love for my mother's Apricot Preserves. I'm running!
  • LOST. It's been over for 2 months and I'm still obsessed.
  • My ukulele; I've been playing it nonstop. Homework has been put on the backburner until I play at least 2 hours a day.
  • Tim. Yup. I wouldn't really call it an obsession, though. Just a massive crush and I love that he calls me everyday. Even when he's rocking out on his guitar, just woke up, or on his way to work. I'm just waiting for the day when all this ends and he rips my heart out. But at the moment, I don't care.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Rant. Rant. Rant.

I haven't forgotten.

I just haven't had time :)
So much news. SO much news. Here it goes.
I had that first date, got a ukulele and had a wonderful time. I can't wait to spend time with this amazing person again. We laughed, talked and had a great meal. I haven't felt this good in a long time and that was all I could think about the entire night.

Now for different news. My online class is killing me. KILLING me. I had to write a paper, not bad, huh? Only my professor did a shit job explaining what she wanted. I email her for clarity; no response. Thanks. So I decided I would have to BS my way through it. My roommates decide to not warn me of the party they were throwing last night. I couldn't concentrate on my paper that was due this morning. I decide to ride my bike to the library at 9:30 pm. I get there and it's closed. Absolutely freaking wonderful. I start riding back when I realize that McDonald's has wifi. I go in and order a chocolate shake (even though I'm lactose intolerant.) and try taking advantage of their McHospitality. The only problem? Their wifi has been down for a week. I have to ride back home where my douchebag roommates are being loud and obnoxious.

I'm almost home when a cop stops me. A FREAKING COP! At this point, I couldn't think my night could get any worse. "Hey miss, what are you doing out so late riding around with a full backpack?" I explain to them my situation and they're not buying it. They ask to see what was in my pack. They thought I was smuggling drugs! Once I convinced them otherwise, they offer to give me a ride home. My bike wouldn't fit, so they drove behind me lighting my way. I get home and lock myself in my bedroom and cried my little eyes out. I had enough of being foolish, so I started cranking on my paper. Got that beast done at 6am.

Feeling better about myself and my horrible night, my Dad calls. He knows I'm going back to cosmetology school in September. He's not supportive: "You need to just finish what you're doing and get that degree." Wake up call, Dad! I can't afford it anymore and can't get a loan. I don't want to do fashion anymore. I've been missing cos for 3 years now and I'm ready to go back. Quit making me depressed and just support me for once. Thanks.

Also, not feeling well..probably due to lack of sleep. Or maybe I have a tumor. Let's hope for the former.

Anywhooooo...I guess I'm finished ranting. Thanks.

Thursday, July 1, 2010


Yeah, I put ads up. I get paid each time someone clicks, so I figured...why not?

Sorry =)

Depression at it's Finest

I've been thinking of starting a vlog. Why? No clue. Also, it makes me wonder how I could even consider it if I have such a hard time keeping a regular blog running. Oh well..maybe some day.

I also thought that I would be one of those awesome thrifty girls who post what they wear everyday. Then I realized that I don't have the time/money (mostly money) to go thrifting all the time. A lot of my clothes are from Target and that's only because it's within biking distance to where I live. Their clothes aren't that interesting. Definitely not interesting enough to write about nearly everyday. Sooo I'm still stumped as to what this'll be about.

Also, I'm trying out dating again. Just thought you should know.

I spent all last night doing homework and talking on the phone. And when I say doing homework, I mean chatting online to wonderful people. And by this, I mean I was also looking for a song to sing for my audition. Audition for Sweeney Todd. Why? No clue..I can't sing, but I miss being in plays. If I don't get cast, I'll settle for set building/stage makeup/whatever else.

But the majority of my night was spent on the phone. Until about 3:30 am. Was it worth it? Absolutely. You see, it really sucks, but I was the cause of someone's bout of depression yesterday. I was asked out; I would have LOVED to go, but I had soooo much homework to do. AND he called and said he could "be there in a half hour." What?! That's not nearly enough time to get ready for a date. Not at all.

I explained to him why I couldn't and that I would love to another time. (I know girls say this allll the time to let someone down easy, but I honestly meant it.) He saw this as rejection and he quit talking. And by quit talking I mean we spent 2 hours texting back and forth. He was finding excuses for me not to be interested. How because of his work schedule, he wouldn't be asking me again anytime soon.

After a little while, we spoke on the phone. He started saying things like "I don't want pity. And you're only talking to me because of what happened to your ex. You couldn't save him blah blah blah." What happened to my ex, you ask? That's a story for a different day. But he couldn't be more wrong. I enjoy talking to this person. Even when he's depressed and mopey, he can put a smile on my face. So do I hope he asks me out again? Yes. Do I think he will? Well..after our later conversations, I think maybe it's a possibility. But I won't get my hopes up; that only leads to disappointment.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010


Well, I've decided to start yet another blog. I promise to keep this one afloat, though. :)

I still have no idea whatttt I'll be writing about, but I guess I'll figure it out as I go along. Perhaps this calls for some sort of an introduction? Yeah.

Well, the name's Jean. I live in Michigan and until recently, I went to CMU for fashion design. Also until recently, I had no idea where I was headed in life. I was stuck in a relationship that was going nowhere, I was so unmotivated, I quit doing what I loved and couldn't figure out a career choice. It's been in my head since Freshman year of high school and I let it slip away.

I [thought] I loved this guy. Towards the end, I was so disgusted by everything he did. I couldn't stand to watch him do..anything. He lived with me and never contributed. I felt more like his mother than his girlfriend. I'm never falling into a relationship like that again.

After my Cosmetology friends all started getting their cos licenses, I decided that it was time for me to go back to what I'm passionate about. I went down to the school and I'm starting in September. All I need now is to find a new place in August. My life is looking up and I couldn't be happier.

Oh, I would say that I promise to post everyday, but at this point, it's highly unlikely. I'll probably post about every other day.